Scratchin’ again

I’ll admit it. After I did the lottery challenge last month, wherein I bought $100 worth of scratch-off tickets in 10 days to see if it was profitable (it wasn’t), I became somewhat of an addict for a while. Doing anything for 10 days straight will do that to you.

But last week, I promised myself I would slow down dramatically, and with the help of a rather addictive computer game I played in college to waste my time, I had been doing pretty good. I’d say I have spent maybe four or five dollars on scratch-offs in the past 10 days. Not great, but not bad either.

Well today I got my tax refund back, and went to fill up my gas tank. It held $34, a travesty in itself, so I had a dollar left from my 20, 10 and five. I decided to buy a Straight 8 ticket with it, just because.

I wound up winning $4 on that one ticket, so later in the day I decided to reinvest those winnings, this time on 4 Sweetheart tickets. On the second of the group, I uncovered three $50 amounts, which made me a big winner for the day. I cashed out $35 of it, and bought one of those big $100 million Cash Spectacular tickets ($10) that are all the rage, along with five more Sweethearts because someone once told me that if you ever get a big winner and have the money, buy the next five tickets of the same kind, because they travel in packs.

That person was right, because one of the Sweethearts netted me $100!!! I also won $2 and two free tickets from that five pack, and got $20 off the big ticket!!!

But it doesn’t stop there. I cashed out all but $14 and bought three $2 tickets, because my challenge taught me that they were the most profitable in the long run, along with eight $1 tickets. I won $27 on one of the $2 tickets, three $2 amounts and a two free tickets.

After getting the free tickets, my work was done for the night. I went home happy and $145 in the black (I bought $35 in groceries as well), all from a $1 ticket!

All this just goes to show that there is no rhyme, reason or beating to the lottery, though. It is all a game a chance, and Wednesday was my lucky day I guess.

Good times. But I am still taking some time off.

Alcohol referendum

Last night, after a somewhat long Sanford Area Chamber of Commerce Banquet, I stopped by the Lee County Board of Elections office to check for returns for another story I was working on: The Lee County alcohol referendum.

An aside: Judging by the vote totals, many of you may not be aware that the county even held a vote yesterday on alcohol sales in the unincorporated areas of the county. Most all of the townships turned it down handily, which surprised me.

Anyway, as I walked into the board office, the first person I saw was Director Nancy Kimble, who was headed in the other direction for a smoke break. After exchanging pleasantries, I asked her how the votes were looking.

“Not too good at all,” she said.

Coming from an elections director, this is a loaded response. What did it mean? Was she actually taking a stance on the issue, saying that her side, either for or against, was losing badly? I think that is illegal.

But I soon realized that she wasn’t taking sides at all. As Elections Director, Kimble is concerned mostly with making sure as many people as possible are able to vote with ease. By saying it didn’t look good, she meant the elections in general looked bad, particularly turnout.

As the vote totals later in the night pointed out, less than 4 percent of the eligible voters participated in the referendum — a whopping 736, with 49 of those coming at the county’s one-stop office. That low a number is not even worth Kimble’s time, especially with a busy presidential election cycle ahead.

And the county had to spend at least $10,000 to hold the referendum, opening all 13 precincts. Holding the vote in January was a waste of time, resources and money. You can put the onus on the voters, saying it is their responsibility to get out and vote. But it isn’t their fault that a measly vote on alcohol wasn’t enough for them to take time out of their schedules to vote. If I lived in the county areas, I can’t say that I would have voted either.

The vote should have been held with the May primaries, when a tax referendum will also likely be on the ballot and voters will likely decide who they want to run for governor, senate and several important local elections. That will easily bring out at least 40 percent of the voters in this county, which is a bigger sample size and would give a better representation of the residents’ feelings on the issue.

Plus, the county would have saved money and not wasted Kimble and the rest of the hard-working staff’s time. One pollworker told me she read an entire Nicholas Sparks book Tuesday while waiting on voters to show up. Another precinct reported just three voters all day long.

But it’s not the board of elections’ fault it was held Tuesday. The board had to hold the election within 60-120 days of the commissioners’ resolution calling for it. The commissioners should have held off on the resolution until late January or February so it could have been held in May.

A little better planning on the commissioners’ part would have made for a better vote and saved us some money. 

Another aside: We young, vibrant reporters at the Herald have made a commitment recently to what Gordon Anderson deems “full contact journalism,” a philosophy wherein we get involved in the stories we report, something Hunter S. Thompson would be proud of.

I was thinking last night as I sat in the board of elections office about maybe volunteering to work a precinct in May for a story, detailing what actually goes into running an election. If you have never been to the board of elections on vote night, you should go check it out. Even in a night like Tuesday, where there were few votes to count, it was a madhouse.  

All the volunteers for the elections office that help ensure Lee Countians their right to vote should be commended, and what better way to do that than through a first-person account? But I have yet to bring it up with my editors or Kimble…I’m not sure about the legalities of it. I will keep you informed.

A beautiful day

Have you ever just taken a second to look at this town? On a clear, beautiful day, this is really a nice little town to live in.

 

I sat at the Java Express today after eating a curry chicken salad sandwich and just took it in with our photographer Brooke Wolfe. The cafe overlooks Depot Park, the centerpiece of downtown, which was bustling with children playing on the train stationed there. In the background, a working train that had to have about 40 cars passed by, carrying a load of lumber and other building materials, and all around cars and trucks passed with people going about their usual business. To my left, the Temple Theatre advertised upcoming shows and an older couple walked down the sidewalk holding hands.

 

I thought to myself, “this sums up Sanford in a nutshell. We are lucky.”

 

Look, I know it is cool to bash your hometown, especially if you are from a place as small as Sanford. Sanford gets a bad rap from people who live here because there is nothing to do.

 

And I’ll be the first to admit that, at times, I am one of those complainers.

 

But I come from a town much smaller than this one (Robbins) where there is none of the amenities you enjoy here. Our theater and depot have fallen into disrepair. Our factories have moved out. Our economy is sagging into hopelessness.

 

As much as I love Robbins (it will always be home), I have found a great place to live here in Sanford. I am glad I came here four years ago, and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.

 

The most appropriate, and hopeful, part of my Depot Park scene today was the train carrying the lumber. This is a town on the move. It is growing right before our eyes, with houses popping up daily. We are lucky in that regard as well, since most towns this size are retracting.

 

We must not fear growth — it is coming whether we like it or not. We must embrace it, for it is the only thing that can save us. In America today, you either grow or die. There are plenty of little towns — like Robbins or Laurinburg — that exemplify this notion. 

 

The first thing that struck me when I moved to Sanford was the vitality of the downtown region. Most people say that small downtowns are dying out with the advent of the chain box stores.  But here we have a strong downtown — one that has become a destination even moreso than a pass-through spot on people’s way to Wal-Mart.

 

But it could always be better. In the coming weeks we plan to take a close look at the empty storefronts in downtown for a series.

 

In the coming days, weeks and months, as spring breathes new life into Sanford, I urge you to take a moment to savor it. Quit complaining — you are here and likely will be for the foreseeable  future, so make the most of it. Get involved by joining one of the many groups, clubs and nonprofit that are aimed at improving the quality of life here. If you need a reminder of why you are here, spend an afternoon at the Java. 

 

This is your town, and it will be whatever you make it. 

Three movies, two nights

It seems that all my fellow bloggers have gotten into the movie reviewing business, so why shouldn’t I? But I’m not very verbose or learned in the techniques of plot structure or character development, so my reviews are not going to be a long conversation with four dollar words on topics you and I do not understand or care about…Me likes what me likes, and dislikes what me dislikes. I can tell you if a movie is good or bad. That’s about it.

So this weekend I rented three movies — Eastern Promises, which is nominated for an Oscar; the Heartbreak Kid, a Farrelly Bros. movie with Ben Stiller and Good Luck Chuck. Here is what I thought of them.

Eastern Promises 

This movie is set in London stars Viggo Mortensen as a Russian mobster and Naomi Watts as a doctor who delivers a baby from a young girl who dies. Watts finds a journal of the unknown girl, gets it translated and figures out that the girl was raped by an old Russian mobster. Other stuff happens. Good times.

I didn’t really like it all that much. In fact, for a mob movie, it was very boring. All the parts were there: Russian mafia, Naomi Watts, sex, violence, Naomi Watts. But I just wasn’t in the mood for it for some reason. And the smirky accents from Mortensen and the other mobsters made me long for Rocky to come in the room and “show them a lot of changin’.”

I can’t see this movie winning an Oscar, although it probably will because the academy has a soft spot for steaming piles of, well, bad movie.

Me, well, I couldn’t stay awake. the whole movie has light music in the background, and with little action on the screen it lulled me to sleep.

Rating: 2 cheeseburgers (out of five) 

The Heartbreak Kid 

OK, so it wasn’t the best Farelly Bros. movie ever. That is Dumb and Dumber. It’s not even Kingpin. Heck, it’s not even There’s Something About Mary.

But it was pretty good. Jerry Stiller and Rob Corddry saved it, but weren’t in it enough. And the brunette (Michelle Monoghan) was smokin’.

With plenty of laughs, it was about what you have to expect out of the Farrelly Bros. these days. But lord do I long for another movie from the brothers that makes me pee my pants again. No, wait. That never happened.

Rating: 2 and a half cheeseburgers (out of five) and a lottery ticket (just for the promise or hope of something more.

Good Luck Chuck

Boy, I would sure like to have those two hours back I spent on this crappy movie that was essentially a vehicle for Dane Cook to have sex with lots of women and show off his crappy, stolen stand-up routine. I hate that guy. He is not funny.

Jessica Alba is in it, but though she is one of the hottest women on the planet I just cannot get past her lack of acting skills. She is awful. She should just stick to silent roles or modeling.

Rating: I award this movie no cheeseburgers, and may God have mercy on its soul. 

It won’t purty

Each year about this time, I dust off the sticks and head out to the course for the first golf outing of the calendar year. And as the title to this post suggests, it’s never pretty. Toward the end of the year, it gets better, but that first round after a winter-long layoff is always downright bad. 

 

I played on the golf team in high school and took it as a PE class in college, but have never received any true lessons. So suffice it to say that my swing looks like an unfolding lawn chair, to quote Tin Cup. 

 

When I played every day on the golf team, I got my score down into the 80s on occasion, but have steadily regressed since. Last year we played a little more than in years prior, though, so by the end of the summer I was shooting in the mid 90s. 

My first round of 2008 happened yesterday, when Gordon Anderson, Billy Liggett and I hit Sanford Golf Course for a nasty round of bad golf on what was otherwise a pristine day.

This summer, I want to get better. I’m planning to buy one of those huge, forgiving drivers at some point, probably when I get my tax refund back.

 

This year, we three duffers also plan to provide you blog readers with in-depth coverage of our escapades on the course. We hope to play rounds with some officials in the area, and document them. We are also thinking of a points system for bad golfers.

 

Stay tuned. 

 

171 Starbucks in a day

OK, so buying $100 worth of lottery tickets ws dumb. Eating a 50-ounce cheeseburger was crazy. But neither compare to this guy’s feats. Mark Malkoff, a producer on The Daily Show, once visited all 171 Starbucks in NYC in one day. Check it out for yourself.

The shocking thing about this is that NYC has 171 Starbucks. I just wish Sanford had one!

He is now living in an IKEA store for some reason.

Insane, impressive and cool!

The helmet is a fraud!!!

Through the tireless efforts of our editor, along with a little technology, we have officially debunked the helmet picture.

Using Photoshop, we layered one picture on top of the other, then morphed one into the other. Nothing changes except the helmet, and you can still see part of his bare head on the very top of the helmet.

We still don’t know what would possess someone to make a fake photo of a guy with a helmet eating a burger. Maybe his head is too big to fit into any helmet on earth or something.

My dreams may be crushed, but we think the proof is safe enough to call this a hoax, making me the greatest helmet-wearing hugh cheeseburger eater on the planet!!! If Badlands Booker wants to put it to the test, bring him down to Sanford. I’ll take him on in the Challenge…That is, if he will wear the helmet.

We are currently working on a flash file of this proof, though none of us are graphic designers, so we may have to call in experts…Byron, where are you? 

Charlie Daniels inducted into Opry Hall of Fame

Story in today’s Herald:

An Opry-sized payback
Gulf man who taught Charlie Daniels how to play guitar joins him on stage for Opry Hall induction

By JONATHAN OWENS
owens@sanfordherald.com

GULF — Not everyone can say he taught a legend the seeds of a craft that would bring him fortune and fame.
Gulf native Russell Palmer can.
In 1951, as a teenager, Palmer befriended a newcomer to Chatham County named Charlie Daniels. One day the pair were sitting around Palmer’s home, and he brought out an old guitar and began playing the two chords he knew.
Daniels became intrigued with the instrument and made Palmer teach him the chords. The rest is country music history.
“Well, he says I taught him how to play on an old Stella guitar,” Palmer said. “I don’t know that I taught him, but I’ll take credit for it.”
Daniels was inducted into the Grand Ole Opry’s Hall of Fame Saturday. The induction was the pinnacle of a career that included platinum records and even a gig at President Jimmy Carter’s inauguration in 1977. Daniels paid Palmer back by inviting him to play in his band as Daniels received the induction.
Palmer played guitar on one of Daniels’ most famous songs — “Long Haired Country Boy” — in front of a capacity crowd at the event.
Since the Opry announced that Daniels would be honored, Palmer had planned to attend the event. But just a few weeks ago, he received a call from his friend asking if he wanted to play alongside the legend on stage, which Palmer graciously accepted.
Palmer called the event “quite exciting, really,” adding he met several celebrities such as Jim Ed Brown, Marty Stuart and Trace Adkins, while at the show and reception honoring his friend.
“It was total chaos backstage, though,” he said. “I don’t know how they get anything done there, but they did.”
On his Web site this week, Daniels recalled his first meeting with Palmer, saying his friend knew how to play “about two-and-a-half chords and I immediately started pestering him to show them to me.”
“I certainly didn’t realize it that day, but that old Stella guitar with the rusty strings and a neck about the size of half a fence post was going to change my life,” Daniels stated. “I guess Russell and myself motivated each other, because we set about learning to play with a passion. And woe be to anybody who happened by who knew a chord we hadn’t learned, because we got really good at badgering people to teach us.”
While in school at Goldston High in the mid-1950s, Palmer, Daniels and couple of others formed a bluegrass band called the Misty Mountain Boys. Palmer and Daniels also made their first trip to the Opry in 1954 as part of an excursion to Nashville which included stops at the Ernest Tubb Record Shop and a couple of other shows.
It was the first of several trips to the country music Mecca the pair made together —including the one Saturday night.
“Back then, they would have two shows in one day,” he said. “But we bought one ticket and stayed for both of them. We never got caught, either.”
Though Daniels moved back to Wilmington in 1956 and continued in the music business, Palmer stayed in central North Carolina and went into the funeral business. But the pair remained friends over the years, he said.
“We still talk quite frequently,” he said.
Now 71 years old, Daniels made 110 tour stops last year. He has a new album, “Deuces,” in stores now featuring duets with guest artists like Travis Tritt, Gretchen Wilson, Vince Gill, Earl, Gary and Randy Scruggs, Dolly Parton, Darius Rucker and Brad Paisley.
He said he owes much of his success to his friend in Gulf, who is a couple years younger than Daniels.
“It is an honor that I can’t begin to articulate,” Daniels stated of the induction. “There is no way I can express what it means to me. And to make it special, I will be joined on stage by Russell Palmer, the man who taught me my first guitar chords all those years ago.”
It was the opportunity of a lifetime, but Palmer, who is the funeral director at Bridges-Cameron Funeral Home in Sanford, said those first guitar lessons were free.
“I don’t know that it was payback,” Palmer said. “He doesn’t owe me anything.”

Did the helmet really happen?

I have uncovered a conspiracy far greater than even Oliver Stone could imagine!!!
I wore the helmet in the Andy’s Challenge last week as a tribute to my favorite picture, shown in a blog post below.
But upon further review, after a quick google search of “guy eating cheeseburger,” I found this photo: 

What’s missing here? The helmet, of course!

Did the helmet really happen at all? Or was my hero blinded by fame enough to have it magically photoshopped on? You be the judge.

So if the helmet is a fake, does that mean I am the greatest helmeted cheeseburger eater of all time?

The seven deadly sins

So Gordon and I were talking last night, and I realized that I have committed two of the seven deadly sins (greed and gluttony) in the course of trying to up my blog hits. I’m thinking of trying to do them all now and have come up with a few challenges to help me in this pursuit. If you have any other ideas, let me know.
Already accomplished: 
Greed — The Lottery Challenge (didn’t pay. ’nuff said.)

Gluttony — Andy’s Challenge (I think I got the best of that one.)

Future Endeavors: 
Envy — I could try to steal Corvettes or something, since I envy people who have them. But I ain’t trying to go to jail for this thing.

Wrath — I could try to beat someone up or something, but I’m sure that would end horribly. I’m like State. I can’t beat anything.

Sloth — The Full House Challenge. Alex Podlogar told me once that his friend in college had a theory that at any point in the day, you can find a rerun of Full House on TV. I’d like to sit at home one day and test it out for myself. But I think Saved by the Bell or Spongebob Squarepants would work better these days. Spongebob is on all the time. I think I saw it on CNN and CMT at the same time the other day.

Vanity — I think I could go to Coty and get them to donate as much makeup as they could to me, then put as much on as I could stand at once. That’s kind of lame, though. There must be a better one out there.

Lust — I commit this one every day I think. Still haven’t thought of one for it, though, besides going to The Flame, hitting on as many women as I can and counting the number of times I get slapped. Most of those slaps will probably come from my girlfriend.