Bill Clinton in Sanford

All I could think as I waited with nervous anticipation this morning in the parking lot of the McSwain Extension Center was “Bill Clinton is going to be in Sanford! Wow. This is why I do this job.”

Then we waited. And waited. And waited. Clinton was an hour-and-a-half late, though the crowd didn’t seem to hold it against him. He swooped into town in a rush and left just as quickly, barely even touching the sandy southern Lee County soil. But this town won’t soon forget it.

Although I am not really sure just how many votes he’ll get out of the event. It seemed that the crowd was more interested in seeing a celebrity than hearing about Hillary’s plans for our future.

Bill Clinton is still wildly popular in most Democratic circles, and I would venture to assume that he would easily walk away with the nomination even today if he were running against Obama and probably have little trouble with McCain, either.

But he’s not running, and I often wonder if it is good for Hillary to use him as a surrogate at all.

His speech was classic Clinton: pseudo-frank talk about gas prices, oil, the war and education, among other topics now popular in Democratic circles. But he knows how to move a crowd and is the most charismatic person I’ve ever seen in, well, person. He could probably get up there and read the phone book for an hour and the crowd would want more at the end.

His use of self-deprecation to endure himself to Sanfordians, such as his quip about doughnut holes in the current senior citizen prescription drug plan (“I always liked the doughnut hole because it was the most guilt-free part of the doughnut. Now they’ve given the doughnut hole a bad name, too.”), was, as usual, masterfully done.

A good time was had by all. And at least he came to see us. It’s like we matter or something. Imagine that.

Obama ballin’

Barack Obama played basketball with the Tar Heels yesterday. Just thought you would like to know that.

Who’s Bad?

Let me preface this by saying that, yes, I enjoy a good Michael Jackson song every once in a while. I’m not a fanatic, but if “The way you make me feel,” “Man in the Mirror” or “PYT” comes on, I have been known to crank it up a little.

So this past weekend was crazy. Both Billy and Kevin went out of town on vacation and I had my first taste of the editorial side of the paper. I was in charge for three solid days! Other than firing Gordon Anderson a couple of times, though, everything went surprisingly well.

To treat myself on Saturday night, after all the pages were “put to bed,” I joined Gordon and a few other friends at the Cat’s Cradle in Chapel Hill, where we watched “Who’s Bad?” — a Michael Jackson cover band, perform while celebrating the birthday of our other friend, Ryan “Bobby Power” Rockwell (of Sanford).

We’re not gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that. We’re just some dudes that thought it would be fun to watch a Michael Jackson cover band. And it was. Ryan and I acted out the whole video on “The Way You Make Me Feel.”

For a cover band, these guys were great. Gordon, a self-described music snob, said countless times during the night that they were too good to be playing someone else’s music. And he was right. The lead singer/impersonator sure didn’t have Michael’s moves, but hey. It can’t be perfect — isn’t the real Michael in jail or something?

Here’s a sample of what we watched. It’s a pretty low-quality video, but it’ll do:

Freezing prices

So I watched Deep impact the other night on HBO, mostly because there was nothing else, though I think it was the better of the two comet-destroys-the-earth movies that came out in 1998 (the other, Armageddon, where Ben Affleck saves the world, was horrible).

Forget all the comet talk, though. There was one part of President Morgan Freeman’s speech announcing the end of days that has stuck with me ever since. He said he was going to freeze prices so there wouldn’t be any profiteering or hoarding from the earth’s misfortune in the days leading up to, well, Deep Impact.

That got me wondering. Can a president actually do this? How would it even be possible without declaring all out martial law? I need some of you lawyers and economists out there to help me out on this.

NAFTA — not so good afta all

As a senior in college, I had to take an upper-level course to complete my political science degree. I really wanted a class in state politics, but given that I needed one more science class to graduate and the only time meteorology — which was the most interesting one (and supposedly easiest, although I would debate that any day) to me — was offered was at the same time as the state politics class, I settled for a class on International politics and globalization.

The class basically centered on two events. Since it was spring, 2003 and we were on the cusp of invading Iraq, the majority of classtime was spent investigating and dissecting that situation, complete with a liberal professor’s rantings on how it was a terrible idea. Turns out he was right after all.

But we also spent at least a month on NAFTA and its effect on the future. Surprisingly, the prof and most of the class came to the conclusion that NAFTA and other free trade agreements were inevitable in an ever-increasingly global economy. I was skeptical, but arguments from Thomas Friedman and his ilk were sufficient enough to sway me.

Turns out I may have been wrong on that one. In hindsight, after a few years of watching manufacturing jobs leave and oil skyrocket to $4 a gallon, maybe NAFTA wasn’t a good idea after all. I would suggest that, even moreso than the credit crisis or the housing market crunch, deals like NAFTA have us in our current economic pickle. Follow with me.

There was a time when a high school graduate, or even a dropout, could get a good-paying job at a local plant and live a middle-class lifestyle right here in town. Now, I have friends that drive up to an hour to work because they cannot find a good-paying job in town — one that doesn’t require an advanced degree.

That commute eats up their paycheck because of the gas prices. Then the mortgage payment is due. And add to that the skyrocketing costs of food and energy because of the gas prices. It’s no wonder we are currently struggling.

Go back to school, you say. Get trained for a good-paying job. For a single mother living paycheck to paycheck, that’s much easier said than done. I have a bachelor’s degree and I wouldn’t be qualified for most of the jobs at Wyeth or any other high-tech manufacturer in town.

So as you cast your ballot in the primary next month, you may want to think about this. Sadly, it’s unlikely that such agreements will ever die until they take down the country with them, especially not in the next election cycle. Hillary Clinton was first lady when NAFTA was passed, and her husband worked hard for it. John McCain is a Republican, so good luck getting him to pass anything that is anti-trade. And Barack Obama, well, I’m sure he could spin a good tale about how heartbreaking the trade agreements are, but I doubt he would have the gumption to stand up to free traders and return fairness to the American economy.

We’re doomed.

I was watching John Oliver’s stand-up performance last night on Comedy Central, and he had a great idea for leveling the playing field. Each product made in a foreign country by exploited workers should come with a label that includes a Wall Street business man urinating on a kid working in a factory, similar tot he ones you see on the backs of pick-up trucks in town. I can’t find it on Google yet, but I think it is a great idea. People need to know that those toys and clothes that they are buying at Wal-Mart are killing them and their wallet.

Great commercials

There have been a few great commercials on lately. Makes you wonder where all the admakers were during the Super Bowl since this year’s commercials were severely lacking.

First are the baby commercials from ETrade, which I believe were on the Super Bowl. These are hysterical.

Then there is the GEICO Loren Wallace commercials. You usually only see these during race broadcasts, but they are classic. Each one. My favorite line: “If you’re talking about Mike Wallace, the story ends with me putting him in the wall.”

And here is Mike talking about Loren:

But my favorite is the new GEICO caveman commercial where he is dancing in front of a white backdrop. That one is so new it is not even posted on youtube, though I did find this link. Watch for it during primetime tonight.

4/20

Sunday is 4/20, the day every pothead in the world marks on their calendar. But this post is not about marijuana, much to your chagrin. Sunday is also the ninth anniversary of the Columbine massacre, when two loner high schoolers took out their frustrations on 12 of their classmates in a suburban Denver high school.

In the years since, the Columbine tragedy has been overshadowed by Sept. 11 and the Virginia Tech murders. But I would venture to say that the events of April 20, 1999 had more of an effect on me than either of those. You see, I was a senior in high school in 1999, just getting ready to graduate and head to college. And just like every arrogant teenager, I thought the world revolved around me and that I was invincible.

The news broke around lunchtime at North Moore High School. As the day progressed, we were glued to the television as the death toll rose, both sad and afraid at the same time.

In the days that followed, fears were heightened that we would have a copycat at our school, just as they did at every high school. And as one of the popular kids (president of the student body, editor of the school newspaper, etc…) I was sure I would be on that list. A week later, word got out that a couple of kids had made such a list, along with bomb threats which closed school that day.

Nine years later (has it really been that long?), I hope that we have worked hard enough to secure our schools, in the wake of all of these tragedies. I hope that we have also tried to stem these problems in our youth before they get that far along. Schools should be a place to learn and grow, not a source of worry.

Coincidentally, or perhaps not, Sunday is also Adolph Hitler’s birthday.

Youtube clip of the week: This sucks

No, really, it does. I saw this on the History Channel a few years ago, but it is worth a second viewing. This guy gets sucked into a jet engine aboard an aircraft carrier… and lives to tell about it!

Here is the accident itself

Here is the full show. Wait a few seconds after pushing play to allow our genius youtuber time to find the show on his DVR.

Oh my God. That would suck.

To get an idea of the power of a jet engine, check this out.

Be a Master!

With the Masters, the best of the four majors, coming up this weekend, I have created a private group for espn.com’s Masters best Ball tournament. It’s totally free. All you need is an ESPN profile, which is free as well. Join up today.

Go here
Our group name is Herald Masters
Password: sanfordherald

No prizes will be awarded other than the satisfaction you will get from defeating a bunch of newspaper people. Good luck!

NCAA tournament: Final thoughts

Here are a few thoughts I had while watching last night’s game. It was a great game, even though I still can’t get over the Heels’ loss…

— Mario Chalmers will never pay for a meal in Lawrence, Kan., again after making the biggest shot in the program’s history. And good for him. As Saturday’s Herald pointed out, Chalmers has ties to the area. His father has people in western Harnett County. He was also highly recruited by both Carolina and Duke. Oh, the one’s that get away…

— What the hell, Roy? If you didn’t see, Roy Williams watched the game wearing a Kansas shirt, less than 48 hours after the Jayhawks broke his team’s heart. That’s really not the message you want to send to 18-22 year olds who are deciding on whether or not to come back to school the next year.
I love Roy. But damn. He acts like we made him come back to Carolina sometimes. If he really had such a love of Kansas, why did he come back? We would have found a coach, probably not one as good as Roy. But at least he wouldn’t have worn the opposition’s colors just after his team got their heart ripped out by them.
If I were Tyler Hansbrough, who almost risks his life every night on the court for Roy, my coach would have a lot of explaining to do. I’d say last night went a long way toward losing him, Ty Lawson and probably even Wayne Ellington. Thanks, Roy. I hope showing love for the Jayhawks was worth it.

— In hindsight, maybe the Heels weren’t as good as I thought. I still believe they were one of the four best teams in the country, but after watching the two star-studded casts that played last night I realize that we were lacking several key aspects. True, we were deep enough to beat up on Virginia and State, but Kansas and Memphis proved to be at least eight solid players deep in the final game.
Even though Thomas came on at the end of the year and even Will Graves looked good in spots, we were really only about 6-7 players deep, depending on your thoughts on Alex Stepheson.

— Thank God Kansas won. Now may KU fans can quit being such babies about us stealing their coach. You got your title. Let it go. Of course, they’ll likely have a new enemy in a few weeks when Bill Self takes the job at his alma mater, Oklahoma State. Apparently they are offering him a $10 million signing bonus, which will be hard to pass on.

— Memphis’ collapse last night should be proof to every aspiring baller in America that foul shots are important. Get in the gym and work on the line. It will pay off in the end. Look at Hansbrough, who got more than 300 points from the line this year, which helped him compile all those double-doubles and national player of the year awards.

— There is always next year. The Dude abides. I think we can all take comfort in that. And at least we made it farther than Duke this year.